Miss Snark’s First Victim’s entrant number 14…
Posted: January 17, 2013 Filed under: On the Isla's Inheritance trilogy | Tags: agents, contests, Isla's Inheritance, writing 3 CommentsI realise that blog title is cryptic if you don’t know what I’m talking about, but I love it. The multiple possessive apostrophes! The abstract poetry! It’s like a line of random gibberish being used as a secret password in a dusty basement somewhere.
Ok, maybe that’s just me…
Anyway, as previously mentioned I got chosen by the random number generator gods as an entrant in the Miss Snark’s First Victim Secret Agent contest for January. The main goal is to get feedback on the first 250 words of my manuscript. The other is for the Secret Agent (whoever he or she is) to come past, fall in love, and ask to see MOAR WORDZ! But, you know, feedback is good too. :p
The entries went up today; you can find mine here. Feel free to check it out.
Internet research while writing, aka “You Googled what, now?!”
Posted: January 15, 2013 Filed under: On writing | Tags: internet, research, writing Leave a commentTwo thoughts occurred to me tonight, while I was on hold for half an hour, listening to music I think may have been composed by monkeys. Not trained monkeys either: ones that fling poop at you at the zoo.
One is that writers really have it a LOT easier these days than they did 20 years ago. Hello, internet! (And yes, I know 20-year-ago writers still have it easier than writers 40 years ago, when they were either typing or handwriting their novels. But I wasn’t alive 40 years ago, and this is all about me. It’s my blog post. :p )
I went to university in the ‘90s and I remember how slow it was to research anything. Don’t get me wrong, I love libraries. But when you’re in the middle of writing a scene and you suddenly want to know the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow, you can’t beat the internet for giving you a quick answer! (Or the correct phrasing of a Monty Python quote.)
The other thought I had is that I Googled (and Wikied) some seriously odd things while writing my first two novels.
Here is a selection, off the top of my head:
- The average weight of a six-year-old boy.
- The colour of happiness.
- Bluebottles, aka Portuguese Men O’ War.
- The Greek muses.
- Intensive care units. One of my best friends ended up having a short stay in one after some surgery, so he helped fill out the details. The things people do for friendship; seriously! What a champ!
- Different types of European faeries. Look up the sluagh some time; I bet you $10 JK Rowling based the Dementors on them.
- Charm bracelets. I actually ended up with a Pandora bracelet because of this research (oops)!
- The shape of a shark’s jawbone.
- French cakes.
- Car keys, tyre irons and the buckles on seatbelts. When you’re writing a book about faeries suddenly you have a burning desire to understand what common metal items are made of.
- Godwin’s Law.
- The phases of the moon.
- Management of NSW national parks. Even more boring than it sounds.
- The various gaits of horses. Not just what they’re called (I knew that) but the rhythm.
- Canberra’s elevation above sea level.
- Antique furniture.
- Sidelights. You know the long, thin window that a lot of houses have beside the front door? Those things.
The funny thing is that none of this is big stuff. That’s partly because my books are urban fantasy and I set them in my home town, so I didn’t need to invent a setting from scratch. I have a huge amount of respect for those that do this, and do it well. All the little details I looked up are because I’d visualise a scene and know what something looked like, but not necessarily know how to describe it well. Hence, the internet.
In his book On Writing*, Stephen King says that the key to good description is to get a clear mental picture of your scene, and then to describe the most interesting details—not going overboard in the process. I’m still learning to get the balance right, as my most recent bout of editing has demonstrated to my acute embarrassment. But being able to look up something I’ve imagined in my scene, when I don’t know what it’s called (for example, the sidelight), is invaluable.

I love you, internet. Never leave me!
What’s the oddest thing you’ve looked up while drafting?
* If you haven’t already got a copy of On Writing you should go buy one. Right now. Go!
My editing process, and words to be wary of…
Posted: January 9, 2013 Filed under: On writing | Tags: adverbs, editing, passive sentences, words to be wary of, writing 7 Comments
I’ve made this all blurry so you can’t read my shame.
I mentioned here that I like to let a completed manuscript sit for a month before I do my first edit on it. I have one very good reason: to give myself a bit of distance from the draft, so I can start to see issues with the text, pacing, plot, characters—everything. This month, between reading and thinking about my next book I’ve started re-editing Isla’s Inheritance (my first MS).
One of the other tricks I use to give myself some impartiality on my work is to edit a hard copy printout. I draft on screen (well, duh), usually in a san serif font like Arial or Calibri. Then I convert it to Times New Roman, a serif font, and print it. Some studies claim san serif fonts are easier to read on screen and serif fonts on paper; it works for me, at any rate.
I love Word track changes when I’m editing other peoples’ work. It saves me (or them) having to enter in the edits, which is great. But if I read my work on screen I tend not to see things that need fixing. Incorporating all those hard copy edits onto the electronic manuscript is tedious, but I have yet to find a better way that works for me.
Other tricks I’ve heard writers use to try and give themselves that mental space include changing font size; formatting it so it looks like a book (justified text, number of words per line, etc); reading out loud; or even using a text-to-speech function so their computer reads it out loud for them. Maybe one of these will work for you.
I waffle when I write. Unnecessarily passive sentences, wordy sentences—you name it. This time around, I’ve been especially brutal with dialogue tags. You know the things you put after someone speaks? Those. I try and avoid using them if it’s obvious who is speaking. Sometimes I can indicate who’s speaking by having them do something in the same paragraph as the dialogue. For example:
“Get stuffed.” He scratched his chin with his middle finger.
If I can’t avoid a dialogue tag, my first choice is “said”. Readers don’t even see “said”; they skim right over it without pausing, so it doesn’t slow them down (if they stop and notice a word, it’s usually the wrong word). The only time I use any other dialogue tag (whisper, grunt, gasp, cry, wail, snarl, growl) is when there is no way the reader could get the tone from the words. For example, I wouldn’t usually use “yell” or “shout” because you can convey that with an exclamation point and the words the character is using.
If you do decide to use a dialogue tag other than “said”, make sure you don’t go overboard. A conversation in which everyone is gasping, crying and growling is, well, silly.
I’m also a big fan of the find and replace tool as a supplement to a thorough read of my work; if I notice I’m overusing a word or phrase, I’ll search for it throughout the entire document.
Here is a list of words and phrases to be wary of; some of these I’ve added to my list after folks on Twitter commented on them. Thanks, Twitter. 🙂
Suspicious words
Adverbs (words usually ending in ly) – Stephen King describes adverbs as being like dandelions; one might be an unusual and attractive feature in your garden, but if you leave it, it will spread until you have no lawn, just weeds. I do a search for words ending in “ly” and see whether I need them. Sometimes I can delete them outright; other times I can write around them. I rarely leave them. (Note: “rarely” in the previous sentence is an adverb, which I decided to leave. So too would be “seldom”, which doesn’t end in ly. This is why a word search is a supplement to a proper edit, not a replacement for one.)
around – I tend to use this to qualify numbers. “I woke at around seven.” The reader doesn’t care about whether the number is that precise. As the Cyberman said to, well, everyone else: DELETE, DELETE, DELETE!
began to, started to – “She began to run” is a long-winded way of saying “She ran”. Sometimes “began to” can be useful—say, when a girl begins to cry halfway through an argument with her boyfriend—but not usually.
had – I’ve seen some people suggest you never need the word “had”. I don’t agree; in a past-tense novel it can be useful to flag that you’re talking about something that happened prior to the current scene. For example, “I had been to the shops”. If you say “I went to the shops” the way you would in a present-tense document (or life) then people will get confused about when the event happened. That being said, it’s not always necessary so use with caution.
of the – This is a typical indicator of a passive sentence, which is often unnecessary and always more wordy than an active sentence. For example: “The hair of the dog” vs “The dog’s hair”. Times you might want to keep a passive sentence include when the actor in the sentence is irrelevant or unknown; for example, “He was killed” versus “Bob killed him”. The latter is spoileriffic!
possibly, probably, likely, usually, almost, mostly – Do you need the qualification? If not, it should go.
seemed to – Because both my books are in the first person I overuse this phrase to describe my character’s interpretation of others’ feelings, thoughts or opinions. But nine times out of ten it doesn’t need to be there.
suddenly – I tend to include this one (when drafting) to give the reader that sense of shock. But really, “the house suddenly exploded” isn’t any more shocking than “the house exploded”. Roll out the Cybermen again.
that – Sometimes you need “that” in a sentence. There are quite a few of them throughout this blog post. But you can often delete it with no impact on the meaning. When I searched it in my first manuscript, I removed it 600 times! That was horrifying. (See what I did there?)
very, really, pretty (when it’s being used to mean “very”), just, simply, totally, finally, apparently, allegedly, supposedly, usually, awesome, fabulous, fantastic, incredible, wonderful – I keep these in dialogue and thoughts (because that’s how people talk), but at almost no other time. Note a lot of them are also adverbs?
What words do you try and edit out of your manuscript?
My next project
Posted: January 5, 2013 Filed under: On the Isla's Inheritance trilogy, On writing | Tags: fantasy novel, Isla's Inheritance, Lucid Dreaming, urban fantasy, writing 7 CommentsNow I’ve finished Book Two (the as-yet-unnamed sequel to “Isla’s Inheritance”) I’ve decided to write something different. I do intend to also write Book Three—the series was always envisaged as a trilogy—but, for several reasons I won’t bore you with, I thought a break might be a good idea.
My dilemma is I have two different story ideas.
One is a fantasy novel. I have the main characters, most of a plot, and the beginnings of a setting. I also have the resources available to research the rest of the setting. I think it could be awesome.
The other is an urban fantasy. I only have the main character. It’s a cool concept, and one that isn’t too overdone (I think! Or hope!). The plot would make or break the idea.
Common sense is telling me to write the fantasy novel, purely because it’s more developed. But urban fantasy is my favourite genre. And I am terrified of complex world-building. I’ve never done it before, and you can’t write a fantasy novel without it.
Terrified, I say!
I’m leaning toward the fantasy novel because it scares me more, and maybe that’s a good thing. I should challenge myself and not chicken out and write something similar to the two books I’ve done so far.
If you have any thoughts I’d be grateful, but this post is really a whinge because I hear that’s what blogs are for. 😉

Emo Doctor Who is emo. Like me. Wah!
My new year’s resolutions…
Posted: December 30, 2012 Filed under: On me, On writing | Tags: new year's resolutions, writing Leave a commentI don’t usually do these things. Resolutions, I mean. But I’ve decided this year that I will – so here, blogosphere, are my declarations of intent for 2013:
1. By the end of the year, I will have either found an agent or publisher, or will look at indie publishing routes for Isla’s Inheritance and its sequel.
2. I will finish writing another novel. (I’d aim for two but, let’s be honest, I don’t have that much spare time!)
3. I will edit my second book and see if I can find some beta readers for it, so it’s ready to go.
4. I will stop being a cagey, secretive writer with people I know personally. I may be a wannabe published author but, with two novels completed, I can probably say I’m a writer, at least. :p
5. I will get more exercise. I will use the gym at work: it’s free and I really have no excuse.
Do you do the new year’s resolution thing? If so, what are yours?
Edit: Number four: check! I outed myself on Facebook to all and sundry today. Now if only the others come so easily. 😉
What to do after you finish your manuscript.
Posted: December 29, 2012 Filed under: On the Isla's Inheritance trilogy, On writing | Tags: agents, editing, Isla's Inheritance, writing 6 CommentsI finished my second manuscript last night. I’ve still got to incorporate a couple of things: nuances I missed in the mad rush for the finish. But once that’s done, the drafting stage of the unnamed book I’ve been calling Book Two (yes, I’m a creative genius) will be complete.
You may be thinking—especially seeing I’m an editor by trade—that I’d be jumping straight into editing it. And I’m keen, believe me. I have all the crazy momentum of the last few weeks of writing, the urge to be doing, boiling away in my brain. But that would be a really, really bad idea. So if you’re in the same boat as me, this is my advice to you (imagine me shouting this through a megaphone in a hostage situation):
Put the manuscript down. Back AWAY from the manuscript!
When you first finish writing anything—novel, short story, article, shopping list—you are too close to see it objectively. There are a few tricks to let you review it more impartially. Some people suggest changing the font so you’re looking at it differently to how you saw it during drafting—this works for me when I preview the final version of a blog post, so it ought to work for a novel too. (It probably won’t work for a shopping list, unless you draft those electronically.)
I personally like to print my manuscript and edit in hard copy. Transcribing edits back into the soft copy is a bitch, but it’s worth it.
However, the best thing you can give yourself is time.
When I finished Book One (now called ISLA’S INHERITANCE), I made myself wait a full month before I opened it again. The only thing I let myself do was a spellcheck and some formatting. That’s it. But I didn’t waste that intervening period.
I read an agent’s blog. There are quite a few out there, but the one I chose was Miss Snark. The blog has been dark since 2007, but the archives are available and they are pure gold, my friend. They stopped me from making rookie mistakes when I eventually started querying agents. No, my mistakes (and I have made them) have been unique and individual ones!
This time, I’m thinking about pulling out Stephen King’s On Writing, which is one of the best books on the subject out there. I’ll reread it, see what lazy habits I developed in the drafting stage so I’m ready to go when I start editing. Also, while Book Two was a sequel to ISLA’S INHERITANCE—and I do have the beginnings of Book Three bubbling away in my subconscious (I’d always planned a trilogy)—I’ve also got an idea for a completely different book, which requires world-building and research. So I’ll work on that too.
As you can see, I won’t be wasting all that energy and forward momentum. I’ll just be using it in different ways.
Where I rant about lazy writing…
Posted: December 28, 2012 Filed under: On writing | Tags: coincidence, editing, writing 5 CommentsI recently discovered an entirely new fantasy series by one of my long-time favourite authors, and gleefully ordered all five books off the interwebs. (Ok, clearly the series wasn’t that new. But it was new to me. M’kay?) The first one, where she introduces the premise of the series, was very cute, although the combat at the end felt tacked on. The bad guy appeared out of nowhere because I guess she realised she needed an ending.
But…
I’ve just finished the third book. And I’m regretting having bought the other two. This is an experienced but prolific writer, and I can’t figure out whether she’s gotten lazy, or whether she makes her publishers so much money that when she says she doesn’t need an editor they actually believe her instead of saying, “YES YOU DO, PENMONKEY! NOW WRITE! AND DO YOUR MONKEY DANCE! MWAHAHAHA!”
(That’s what publishers do, right?)
There were a few things about the book that bugged me:
1. The lead characters fell in love in about two days. But this was a fantasy/romance novel, so I guess you get that as part of the genre.
2. The enter key? It’s to your right… One particularly noteworthy paragraph is a PAGE AND A HALF LONG! More than forty lines! I ended up getting bored and skipping it. I don’t care how magnificent your prose is, how exciting the fight scene, that is just too long—especially in genre fiction. (Maybe that’s the norm in literary fiction; I don’t know. I don’t read it for a reason!)
3. A lot of the information was repeated. The storyline followed two characters, and they would often notice the same things separately. Not even big, important things, but things like décor. What material the inn is constructed of. As a reader, I already know after the first time you mention it. I don’t need to have unimportant things described twice! (Or even important ones!)
4. The characters seemed to share a brain (except when it came to noticing the décor). The author would have one character discover something the hard way. Then the other, in the next scene, would intuit the exact same thing with absolutely no prompting or justification whatsoever. One character discovers a hidden tunnel; the other guesses there must be hidden tunnels. One character decides to go to the stable and try to talk to another in secret; the other coincidentally decides that exact moment is a GREAT time to go to the stables. Lazy. Lazy. Lazy! (See how annoying that repeating thing is?)
I don’t think there should ever be a coincidence in a novel that favours the protagonist. I’ve got no problem with the best friend coincidentally turning up at the worst possible time, so it looks like the main character is doing something inappropriate with the best friend’s boyfriend. I’ve got no problem with the bad guys—or police—coincidentally arriving when the good guys are trying to break into the occult bookstore to steal a tome to prevent the apocalypse. Go nuts making life hard for your protags.
But if you have the coincidences rain down to help the main characters, expect me to throw your book across the room and then rant on the internet about it.




